All throughout our lives there will be points that help shape our lives and define who we are. Entering Fatherhood is one of those moments (as cheesy as that is).
There are several milestones that change your world in so many ways. Events like leaving school and finally becoming part of the adult world, gaining your own independence by learning to drive and getting your first job and becoming a parent are the most prominent in my mind. They will all inevitably define who we are and further shape our futures leaving a legacy behind and creating our own marks on the world around us.
The title makes it sound far more epic than what it is to outsiders, giving the impression that it’s similar riding into battle on a noble steed in a Lord of the rings-esque manner. It is fair to say, if you aren’t connected to the parents in some way or haven’t children yourself it isn’t that interesting. I was exactly the same before having a child, babies were cute but they don’t really do anything. They can’t communicate with anyone in the first few weeks and they can’t share anything with you, they just lay there looking cute.
My Experience so far…
I have only been a parent for just over two months so far but it changes so many aspects of not only my life but that of my partners, our siblings and parents.
When our daughter entered the world something changed, it became very real very quickly that suddenly we had this little baby that couldn’t do anything without us. In alot of ways I feel the ties to my family are alot closer now I have a family of my own which may seem an odd thing to say but before I would easily go a month at a time between talking to my parents. I understand how my dad must have felt when me and my siblings were younger not I have entered fatherhood myself. Now we speak to both sets of parents at least once a week as I appreciate better how important they are to have around.
Even the simplest of tasks such as going shopping goes from just being able to get into the car to having to pack a small suitcase of supplies to care for the little homonculus we brought into the world. If it’s longer than fifteen minutes it always pays to be prepared. That also said, it isn’t much different if we are in the house, preperation is key.
It is inevitable that at some point you will be covered in more forms of bodily fluid than you would ever want (I am counting faeces in this purely for the reason that at some point in the first few weeks, it may as well be). If you are squeamish however it would be a worthwhile investment to get a surgical mask and some disposable gloves.
No matter how much sleep you catch it will be significantly less than you are accustomed to (I have been very fortunate that my partner has been so amazing with the night feeds, I am very spoilt). I am personally amazed at how composed we both are when faced with an infant bellowing in our ears, it’s fair to say if it was anything else making the noise my patience would have worn thin a long time ago but so far it hasn’t phased us no matter how much work it can be. Though I don’t think I could get mad at her as it’s not like she can tell us any other way at the moment.
Regardless of any of the unpleasantness that comes with fatherhood, I wouldn’t trade it for anything as there is far more good than bad. From the gurgling noises and the way my daughters face lights up when I come home from a hard day. Fatherhood has been pretty amazing and she is changing and growing very quickly so far, there will be lots more to enjoy in the future!